How do I survive a divorce without becoming bitter?

Ask for the thing bitterness offers and cannot give: a self no longer built around the injury. Grieve honestly; name what was taken and what you gave away. But do not make the prayer a case against the other person — that keeps you tied to them. Ask instead to be able to want good things again, and, when you can and not before, for their good too. Offered for good, never against anyone.

The phrase is refuat halev — a healing of the heart: not forgetting the wound, but no longer being ruled by it.

From the sources “He heals the broken-hearted and binds up their wounds.” — Psalm 147